tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post3169380579485499312..comments2023-10-23T15:18:13.558-05:00Comments on Carpe Diem: 5.9Allyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01816929643644946388noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-2185190003635313092007-01-25T10:48:00.000-05:002007-01-25T10:48:00.000-05:00I'm late to the comment party on this post...just ...I'm late to the comment party on this post...just catching up.<br /><br />I love...LOVE LOVE your scoring policy. I think it perfectly exemplifies the sentiment with going out on dates with guys, especially those that we meet online.Losthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01423966012856118334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-34938965632471472342007-01-23T09:45:00.000-05:002007-01-23T09:45:00.000-05:00I'm with you on your score sheet sister... but the...I'm with you on your score sheet sister... but there are those that are nervous, as Ella said. And finally I agree with GLB (haha)... sometimes you do need another date or two to determine if what you're seeing is truly what you're seeing.. 3 dates is a good rule. However, there are those that you know in the VERY FIRST date that NO WAY on earth would you want a 2nd.. nerves or not! (shiver).<br /><br />Maybe another date with that one Ally... he does seem self-absorbed.. let's just make sure it's not nerves. By the 2nd date, you could call him out on it though, if he does it again. "You've barely asked anything about me... and you've talked about yourself all night long... did you realize that?" <br />I'd have no problem saying that.Whine Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09036599717915379094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-732507552304817422007-01-22T21:48:00.000-05:002007-01-22T21:48:00.000-05:00Starboard Tack: So do you make spreadsheets or wha...Starboard Tack: So do you make spreadsheets or what? Finally someone pickier than me!Allyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01816929643644946388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-65302298685695051672007-01-22T18:41:00.000-05:002007-01-22T18:41:00.000-05:00I like your rating system!
My rating system is mu...I like your rating system!<br /><br />My rating system is much harsher than yours -- I rate women in 6 categories, and seek a score of at least 54 out of 60...<br /><br />Perhaps that is why I am not re-married...Starboard Tackhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11937954140116128165noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-92183130187513469242007-01-22T15:36:00.000-05:002007-01-22T15:36:00.000-05:00GLB: I created a "two date rule" a while back just...GLB: I created a "two date rule" a while back just to attempt to help me give people more of a chance and keep an open-mind. I like your last line--about keeping expectations low and standards high. Good advice; thanks.<br /><br />Allen: My thoughts exactly but maybe he was nervous. I'm trying to be open-minded:)<br /><br />DCVita: Having someone greater definitely makes all the difference--and results in a contentedness that certainly cuts down on all the drama and emotions. Excellent point.Allyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01816929643644946388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-2627972334758749022007-01-22T11:50:00.000-05:002007-01-22T11:50:00.000-05:00LOL we are seperated at birth. Totally agree with...LOL we are seperated at birth. Totally agree with your dating scale! I think that first dates are just a bit awkward and there are some things that people do that are slightly annoying (talk too much about themselves or check thier phones every 5 minutes) but giving it a second and/or third chance is prob when you know how the person really is.<br /><br />And I don't think that not caring if they call or not makes us jaded. I think it just means that we are happy and content with our lives (with or without a man!) And that is prob because we have Someone greater in our lives.DCVitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18078983104947437808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-91253418666177999962007-01-22T09:09:00.000-05:002007-01-22T09:09:00.000-05:00my gut says he is self absorbed as anyone on a fir...my gut says he is self absorbed as anyone on a first date should be asking questions to get to know the other persons as opposed to not stop talk about themselves. One more date should flesh that out pretty clearly...Allen Maddinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03975320122826127770noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-23954720396810468172007-01-22T07:08:00.000-05:002007-01-22T07:08:00.000-05:00There's some good advice here. I have a three dat...There's some good advice here. I have a three date rule policy. I figure that you can get a true sense of a person on three dates. Usually you need three to spot the red flags. You've already found his. But I agree that it's worth giving him a chance.<br /><br />I don't agree with Kimberly's advice though. I think coaching comes later. Once you are in the relationship. He's on a job interview now. He should be winning you over. You shouldn't have to help him get the job, he should get it on his own. Otherwise, you'll always be doing his work for him.<br /><br />But give him another shot. And keep your expectations low... but your standards high.GreenLineBoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08103289080586577094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-84604613675454024562007-01-21T20:27:00.000-05:002007-01-21T20:27:00.000-05:00Ivy: I'm trying to be positive though....:)
Dr. R...Ivy: I'm trying to be positive though....:)<br /><br />Dr. RJJ: I'm just saying....<br /><br />Ella: You make a good point--I wasn't exactly on my "A" game either, so my perspective is likely skewed.Allyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01816929643644946388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-36476818481791980982007-01-21T20:01:00.000-05:002007-01-21T20:01:00.000-05:00Thanks for finally giving the back story on Bachel...Thanks for finally giving the back story on Bachelor #1. As you know, I definitely think you should go on date #2 if he calls. He could've been nervous and you could've been distracted with the case you've been working so hard on.<br /><br />I still haven't watched Grey's yet! But hope to soon. I heard it was a good one.ellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04388135445973225989noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-82477768789231151672007-01-21T20:00:00.000-05:002007-01-21T20:00:00.000-05:00OUCH!!! Dr. RJJOUCH!!! Dr. RJJAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-21688819883009865962007-01-21T13:58:00.000-05:002007-01-21T13:58:00.000-05:00Aaron: You definitely need to get on that; glad I ...Aaron: You definitely need to get on that; glad I got the scoop early:)<br /><br />Brookem: I may not hear from him again, but if I do, I think I'll give it another date. You're right; it's always a learning experience of some sort.<br /><br />Dr. RJJ: WAIT just a minute--I said I gave Ken "bonus points" for spelling properly and using correct grammar/commas. I didn't say that was a dealbreak or played a role in his rating on the dating scale. Oh, and thanks for reminding me of the statistical unlikelihood of me meeting the kind of guy I'm looking for:)<br /><br />Billy: Very funny...although there is nothing funny about something being "impotent."<br /><br />Kimberly: I think that's excellent advice. If Ken calls again (and my gut is that he won't but that may be because I felt so "blah" after our date), and the next date goes the same way, I'll say what you suggested. And you're right about "coaching."<br /><br />Croaker: I know what you mean. Online dating seems like a lot of work, which is why it's not appealing to me. The three day trial was a good reminder that it's not for me right now. I guess I just ultimately feel like the finding someone will take care of itself (except when I get restless and do something like this 3 day trial), but I don't know if that's the right attitude either.<br /><br />FC&F: You're right; there are a lot of good things about Ken that would make a second date worth a whirl. Enjoy Grey's! I can't believe you've waited this long.<br /><br />Kathryn: That's hilarious about the eharmony no match! You must have a really unique friend or two:)Allyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01816929643644946388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-18283888754872285402007-01-21T12:27:00.000-05:002007-01-21T12:27:00.000-05:00I can't believe we stopped chatting last night so ...I can't believe we stopped chatting last night so you could watch a mediocre movie!<br /><br />I guess I'll have to blog my date from Friday night. I'm procrastinating. :)Aaronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00584354669062073865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-11563211749629558352007-01-21T10:08:00.000-05:002007-01-21T10:08:00.000-05:00Ally, I for one, agree with your rating system. W...Ally, I for one, agree with your rating system. We all have certain traits we look for in a guy, and you are beautiful, intelligent, and geniune, so you shouldn't lower your standards. I totally agree with the spelling thing. It just happens to be one of my pet peeves.<br />I would go out with Ken again. It can be fun just getting ready for dates, getting to know new people, and in turn learning more about yourself, and what you're looking for throughout the process. Let us know how it goes.megabrookehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07116377733819568110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-50753702836469687462007-01-21T09:10:00.000-05:002007-01-21T09:10:00.000-05:00Dang, Allison you are tough on that rating system....Dang, Allison you are tough on that rating system. Anyone can make a typo-evin me. I agree with Kimberly and I certainly can see why Croaker could be disillusioned about dating after reading your blog. Nothing wrong with having high standards and expectations but you eliminate about 96% of the guys which leaves only 4% to even date but you have to meet them first and they need to be single etc. You may should set just a few definite criteria and go with it. Trust me I have met numerous college educated people who , unlike you and I , are not very good spellers. If "Ken" doesn't even deserve a second date you have no chance of actually getting to know him. Have a good day.By the way you might even make us bloggers self consious about our spelling. I think that may be what Billy is saying or maybe Billy did not take spelling in college. Dr. RJJAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-64019691087683235092007-01-21T08:17:00.000-05:002007-01-21T08:17:00.000-05:00good to know gramar and coma usag is a kee to dati...good to know gramar and coma usag is a kee to datin an that sum volks thinks dat is impotent.Douglashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02714207579669974050noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-83803274135360323032007-01-21T07:58:00.000-05:002007-01-21T07:58:00.000-05:00If he's smart and articulate, and if he's really a...If he's smart and articulate, and if he's really a man, and since I think you are pretty good at calling things what they are and not beating around the bush, perhaps he could handle it if you just commented on his infrequent questioning. like "you know, usually on the first couple of dates I get asked a lot of questions. I notice you don't ask many." That way if he has some reasonable reason why he doesn't ("I figure girls hate that"; "I talk a lot when I'm nervous;" etc.) he has a chance to express it. And he has the opportunity to try to redeem himself. I say give him the benefit of the doubt. I think it sometimes takes coaching for guys to remember that you don't just want to hear about them :) (or maybe they think talking is a good way to try to put you at ease). I'm glad it was at least on the positive end of the scale!!!Kimberlyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07712571084981694176noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-7007555268726495882007-01-21T02:54:00.000-05:002007-01-21T02:54:00.000-05:00Dating is a lot of work no matter how you go about...Dating is a lot of work no matter how you go about it. Somehow I think on line dating is even more work. Reading your post, started me thinking. I don't even feel like putting the work into meeting someone.<br /><br />I hope that doesn't mean I'll be alone for ever but I'm begining to get really comfortable that way.Pausehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05828307322449245662noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-29011969822171959252007-01-21T01:27:00.000-05:002007-01-21T01:27:00.000-05:00I have not watched Grey's yet--on my agenda for Su...I have not watched Grey's yet--on my agenda for Sunday afternoon, but I do think a 2nd date is worth a try. You will never know if you don't do it. You've already said he's intelligent, dresses great, and doesn't misspell.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17276748.post-91868894218040559822007-01-20T23:49:00.000-05:002007-01-20T23:49:00.000-05:00part of me wants to advise you not to go on a seco...part of me wants to advise you not to go on a second date. yet as you said, people are typically nervous on first dates. maybe he talked too much because he was nervous? if he has any potential at all, i'd grant him the second date.<br /><br />as for the eharmony comments, excellent and thoroughly amusing. the only thing better is when a person spends two hours harassing his friends about his qualities and at the end of setting up his profile, eharmony replies with--and i'm not kidding--you are one of a small percentage (2%) of users who cannot be matched with another person in our database. our apologies.kathrynthomashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17043704638425221807noreply@blogger.com