Wednesday, May 30, 2012

It's Hard to Know Where to Start

So much has changed in the last four months that it's hard to even know where to start this post.  There are so many things I could write about, and they are almost all related to my son and being a mom.  I guess that's because the first few months--especially the first 6 weeks or so of a baby's life are so consuming--especially for the mother if she's nursing (and if her husband is traveling a lot for work).  Since Jackson was eating every two hours for several weeks my life revolved around his feedings, which took about 45 minutes and sometimes longer.  And while my day still largely revolves around Jackson since I'm staying at home with him full-time, it now involves more playing, cooing, and interaction and not just feedings and naps. 

I've felt like being a parent has had such a steep learning curve.  Initially I was constantly texting my mom and sister, researching this or that on the internet, and just trying to figure various things out.  I'd guess 75% or more of the questions related to breastfeeding, which has been a very challenging experience, but something I haven't felt quite comfortable quitting.  I could write several posts on this topic, but I'm not really sure anyone (understandably) cares :) Thankfully I've finally found a groove with feeding Jackson, and he's thriving.  In fact, he's downright chunky, and I absolutely love it.  All in all, I'm finally gaining confidence, and I feel like I really know Jackson and his needs now.

I haven't missed working at all and am so grateful not to have the pressure of filing deadlines, urgent calls from clients, etc.  I guess the only things I miss about working are the hour long lunch break and having time to play on the computer (and blog)...which I guess isn't really missing work! And of course, I miss the paycheck and some of my coworkers.  Jackson and I had lunch with them last week though, so we're keeping in touch. 

Thankfully Jackson is a wonderful sleeper and has been sleeping 8-12 hours straight most nights for at least 6 weeks now (unless he breaks out of his swaddle, which means I reswaddle him and he's back asleep within 5 minutes).  And while I'm still not used to getting up at 5 a.m. that's the beauty of not working--I don't have to focus/concentrate so it's okay if I'm a little groggy plus I can nap when he does.  It's funny to me that I accomplish so much now by the time I use to get up for work (8 a.m.), and I'm not even "working."  Staying at home has also meant more time with my family and having the flexibility of day-trips to my hometown.  And since my husband works from home, I even get to hit the pool for a few hours here and there. 

p.s. I'm thankful that my husband's traveling has slowed down, and he's home much more now.