Tuesday, January 08, 2008

A Bigger Pie Please

Happy New Year!

It's hard to believe it's 2008. I have a good feeling about this year; I'll turn 30; I have to decide what to do next career-wise; and I've finally regained my ability to watch movies (I think billing in six minute increments in my former job sort of made it impossible for me to sit still); and in short, life is good.

Life also has a new addition at the moment. Carter & I have been on enough dates now that I've lost count, and I still like him (and the feeling is evidently mutual). It's so fun to be around someone who thinks as much as I do, has well-informed beliefs on most topics, can talk with me for hours with no sense of time, and has a heart for God. And it still feels sort of surreal that I've met someone who I even care to go out with once, much less countless times.

Despite how fun and exciting it is last week I found myself contemplating what this relationship might cost me, especially since we live four hours apart. Meaning I realized that the time I spend with Carter is going to have to come from somewhere else--that just because I've met someone I like does not mean that my pie gets bigger so to speak. For example, since I spent time with Carter during the holidays, it meant I had less time with my family and friends. I realize that's a no-brainer, but after not dating for a year and half, I feel myself clutching to my life as a I know and enjoy it. My life is easy and happy and very much living in the day just the way it is. On the flip side, I like Carter and love our time together. And ultimately when I think about how I want my life to look I know that one day I want to be married and have children--and that marriage is necessarily going to require dating and relationships.

I guess it comes down to taking a risk, realizing that it could mess your life up a bit but it could also enhance your life, adding some chocolate chips to a pecan pie that you thought didn't need anything else--but upon tasting it you realize how wrong you were.

p.s. I'm grateful for the new pink pajamas bottoms my sister gave me for Christmas. They are so comfy.

14 comments:

Accidentally Me said...

Ally...I say this in the kindest, most genuinely helpful way I can...

STOP THINKING SO MUCH!!!

You like him he likes you, and for not, that is plenty:-) Just go with it. If you find yourself resenting the time you spend with him, then he is the wrong guy. If he is right...you will feel like that time is better spent with him than with whatever else you were going to do.

Ally said...

AM: You are absolutely right. I promise that I'm looking for the off switch for my dumb brain. And really these thoughts have been (relatively) fleeting:)

Flat Coke and Flies said...

I have to go with AM--just let life take you in the direction that feels RIGHT. Plus if it's not broke don't fix it...don't try to figure out hte 4 hr difference just yet, that will come with time.

Ally said...

FC&F: I've been surprised with how I've not dwelled on the distance--and you're right--it'll work itself out.

brandy said...

I'm just glad things are going well for you! AM has great advice- whatever is supposed to happen, will. In the mean time? Enjoy it! Happy 2008 my friend.

AaroN said...

What's all this talk about risk? What did you fail to mention when we did lunch this weekend??

Pam said...

Happy New Year!

I'm glad to hear things are going well with Carter. When I think of this "name" I can't help thinking about that carpenter, Carter Osterhouse from Trading Spaces. lol!

anne said...

Is that why I can't watch a movie? I swear I had no idea. And those 30 minute TV shows - I have to be doing something else at the same time.

AM is RIGHT! Just have fun. Yes, something has to give. But this is a good thing and it will right itself in the end. ENJOY!

Ally said...

Anne: My job was totally the reason I couldn't watch movies (or sit still during television shows)--I just lost my ability to sit still and focus for very long. It's taken 7 months to get that out of my system too.

Pam: I don't know that guy but I just googled him, and he's very cute!

Aaron: It's not like this is something I've thought about all the time or something!

Brandy: Definitely doing my best to just enjoy. I can't believe I've done as well as I have:)

ella said...

I think it's innate for our minds to go into over drive when we meet someone we really like. It's beautiful that things are working out with you and Carter...and just let things play out. If it's right, you know that everything will work itself out.

Thinking about a career in Atlanta?

And did you ever tell him about my wink? ;)

Kimberly said...

Hey! I'm excited for YOU! I agree about the pie analogy; i'm determined not to overflow my pie this year and to really enjoy eating it. I want to take my time making a really delicious pie instead of running around trying to find space to put in everyone else's ingredients, and then it turns out all mushy and gross. Okay, I guess I took that metaphor a little too far. Now I'm craving sugar.

allbilly said...

I like my pecan pie unadulterated.

icadle said...

YAY for you!! I hope all goes well!

cdp said...

Happy New Year!

I love this analogy. I would like a bigger pie as well.

With chocolate chips, please.